Due to the many, many, MANY years I spent living my life for other people, I am now FOREVER thinking about what life truly feels like when it fits.
Not what it’s supposed to look like. Not what would look impressive. Not what makes the most sense on paper.
Just, what actually feels right for us.
And I swear, the closer I get to 50, the less interested I am in doing things just because that’s what you’re “supposed” to do. 😂
Our family is at this point where we’re starting to question a lot of the things we used to assume were the goal – a bigger house, more stuff, a packed schedule, constant productivity, always working toward some imaginary future where someday we finally get to relax, travel, have fun, or enjoy ourselves. (Biggest scam we’ve ever been sold)
That version of life just doesn’t feel as appealing anymore.
What matters to us now looks a lot more like freedom. More experiences. More random Tuesdays that feel fun. More road trips. More books. More nature. More family time. More room to actually enjoy the life we’re living while we’re living it.
And SO much less noise.
Less clutter. Less rushing. Less pressure. Less doing things because we feel like we should. Less trying to prove that we’re productive enough.
I think that’s the biggest shift happening in me right now.
For a long time, I thought the goal was to build a life that looked successful. Now I care way more about building one that actually feels good to live.
And maybe that’s where you are too.
Maybe nothing is technically wrong. Maybe your life is fine on paper. Maybe you’re grateful for so much of it.
But something in you still keeps whispering that you want different.
Something that feels more aligned where you have more breathing room, more fun, more experiences, more things that actually make you feel ALIVE.
And I think that’s worth paying attention to.
Because wanting something different doesn’t automatically mean you’re ungrateful. Sometimes it just means you’re changing. Your priorities are changing. Your kids are changing. Your season of life is changing. YOU are changing.
And I think that’s SO exciting.
A little terrifying sometimes, yes. 😂
But exciting.
I’m looking around at our house differently. I’m looking at how much stuff we own differently. I’m looking at the way I work differently. I’m looking at money differently.
And as a family, we’re thinking differently about what we want the next few years to look like.
It’s starting to feel like so much of what we’re craving has less to do with getting more and more to do with making room for the things that actually matter to us.
I think that’s why I’ve felt such a pull toward simplifying our house lately.
We don’t need rooms full of things we don’t use. We don’t need closets packed with stuff we forgot we owned. We don’t need to spend all of our time cleaning, organizing, maintaining, storing, and moving things around.
I’d rather our home support our life than become the whole life.
And I still love cozy.
I will always love cozy. 😂
Give me fall candles, blankets, books, a comfy couch, Christmas lights, a cozy kitchen – ALL OF IT.
But cozy doesn’t have to mean more.
I think it can mean less, but better. A smaller space that feels warm. A home that feels easy. A life where we can leave for a trip without feeling like everything back home owns us.
That sounds so good to me.
And then there’s work.
This one has been a huge mindset shift for me too. I’ve realized I have spent a lot of my life believing that making money is supposed to be hard. Like if it’s enjoyable, flexible, creative, or fun, then somehow it doesn’t count as real work.
And I’m really trying to challenge that.
Because I don’t want to build a business that gives us more income but takes away the life we’re trying to create.
I don’t want to spend all day, every day, working only to say someday we’ll travel. Someday we’ll slow down. Someday we’ll spend more time outside. Someday I’ll have time to read. Someday we’ll do the things we actually enjoy.
No.
The business needs to support the life.
That’s what I’m working on now – YouTube, digital products, podcasting, Etsy, affiliate income, travel content, books, all of these things I’m genuinely interested in anyway.
And I have no idea exactly where all of it will lead.
Which is again, kind of terrifying and exciting at the same time. 😂
But I think for the first time, I’m not asking, “What is the safest thing to do?”
I’m asking, “What kind of life are we actually trying to create?”
That question changes everything.
For us, it looks like more family adventures. Seeing more places. Taking road trips just because we can. Staying in mountain cabins with giant windows. Seeing wildlife. Reading books in beautiful places. Being able to say, “Hey, let’s go somewhere Tuesday,” and actually go.
It also looks like building something creative that belongs to me, giving the boys a childhood full of experiences and not just routines, and creating a life that feels exciting to wake up to.
I don’t want to wait until everything is perfect to start moving in that direction.
That might be the biggest thing I’m learning right now.
You do not have to know exactly what the next chapter looks like before you start moving toward it.
You can know what you want more of.
You can know what you want less of.
You can know what doesn’t fit anymore.
That is enough to start.
And if you’re sitting there thinking, “Okay, but I know I want different and I have absolutely no idea what that means yet,” I get it.
So instead of trying to figure out your whole life at once, I think there are three really simple questions to start with.
What do I want more of?
What makes you feel excited, peaceful, curious, energized, or like yourself again? Maybe it’s travel. Maybe it’s creativity. Maybe it’s more time outside. Maybe it’s being home more. Maybe it’s being home less. 😂 Maybe it’s deeper friendships or less time with the wrong people. Maybe it’s building something of your own. Maybe it’s just having more fun.
What do I want less of?
What feels heavy? What feels noisy? What are you constantly complaining about but also continuing to tolerate? What are you doing mostly because you think you should? What takes way more energy than it gives back?
And then:
What is one thing I can change now?
Not someday.
Not when you have more money. Not when the kids are older. Not when work gets less busy. Not when the house is perfect. Not when life magically calms down.
Now.
Maybe it’s cleaning out one room or booking the weekend away. Maybe it’s finally starting the thing you’ve been thinking about for years. Maybe it’s saying no to something or yes to something that matters. Maybe it’s taking one afternoon a week back for yourself. Maybe it’s getting rid of half the stuff you don’t even like anymore.
It doesn’t have to be huge.
I think that’s where we get stuck sometimes. We think if we want a different life, we have to completely reinvent everything overnight.
You absolutely do not. That sounds exhausting. LOL
You just need to start making little decisions that match the direction you want to go.
I don’t know exactly where we’ll live long-term. I don’t know exactly what this business will look like a year from now. I don’t know exactly how much we’ll travel or how our plans will change.
But I do know this:
We’re making room for more freedom. More intention. More fun. More time. More experiences. More life.
And I am officially way more interested in building that than I am in building a life that just looks good from the outside.
So that’s kind of where we are right now.
Simplifying. Dreaming. Building. Questioning. Changing our minds. Letting go of things. Trying new things. Figuring it out as we go.
Very on brand for us. 😂
And maybe that’s the whole point.
Maybe you don’t need the perfect plan. Maybe you don’t need to know where you’ll be five years from now. Maybe you just need to get really honest about what matters to you now.
What do you want more of?
What do you want less of?
And what’s one tiny thing you can do this week that moves you closer to the life you actually want?
Start there.
You don’t need the whole map.
You just need one honest next step.
That’s what we’re doing too.
And I have a feeling this next chapter is going to be a really good one. 💛
P.S. I created a free worksheet below with each of these questions to help you get a jumpstart on figuring out your next chapter!
